Our guest columnist gives us seven tips to bring joy and happiness, and overcome our emotional ‘blind spots”.
PHOTO TRACIE HEASMAN
Feeling anxiety or stress can really steal the joy out of life. It may come on overnight, or slowly over time. For me, beginning life in a new country definitely had its challenges. Friendless weeks, family thousands of miles away, and holidays spent alone were a few of my joyless issues. Here are seven tips to turn things around and get you back into your power zone, instead of living in what I call your ‘blind spots’.
1/ Focus on your strengths and passions. Nobody else has your unique talents and blessings. Do what you love and love what you do.
BLIND SPOT: Comparing yourself to others. You are not that person. Focus on yourself, instead of wasting precious energy focusing on someone you cannot change. Comparing often leads to resentment.
2/ Slow down. Smell the owers. Watch a sunset. Notice the bird song in the morning and feel the sun on your face. Do something just for fun.
BLIND SPOT: Drama. Emotions such as jealousy, self-pity, frustration, worry, and blame can overwhelm you, and keep you spinning in drama.
3/ Take responsibility. Imagine how much power and freedom you would have if you took responsibility for turning hard situations round and moving forward yourself.
BLIND SPOT: Blaming others sets you up to be a victim and renders you powerless over your circumstances. You cannot change if you play the victim.
4/ Stop ‘hitting the ball back’. When you feel offended by a remark, thank the other person for their opinion, change the subject or leave the room.
BLIND SPOT: Defending and being offended. This creates more drama and wastes a lot of energy.
5/ Practice gratitude. A generating emotion – the more you feel grateful, the more you’ll create things to be grateful for. Make a habit of remembering three to ve things you are grateful for, every morning before you rise. It could change your life.
BLIND SPOT: Rehashing the past. Like defending yourself, this is an exhausting energy waster. The past is over. Let it go and move on.
6/ Be clear about your direction. What you give attention to, increases in your life.
BLIND SPOT: Worrying. There’s an expression, ‘Worry is a prayer for something you don’t want.’ What you focus on expands. Instead ask yourself, ‘Is this true? How do I know this is true?’ If it is, take action. If not, let it go.
7/ Trust. Instead of striving, pushing or competing for what you want, get clear with what you desire and allow the perfect person or situation to come to you. Stay curious to the possibilities and opportunities around you.
BLIND SPOT: Perfectionism and control. Going after these two are like chasing the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. They are an illusion and are often based in fear.
Many of us think that once the stressful person or situation changes, then we will feel peaceful and happy. But actually, your peace and happiness isn’t decided externally. It lives within you. And like magic, the stress, anxiety and drama around you will disappear once you recognise your blind spots.
The most important step to change is awareness. Slow things down and notice. You’ll be amazed at what a big difference these small changes can make.
Cindy is a transformational life coach who lives in the Bay of Plenty. She works with people who look happy and successful on the outside yet are struggling in one or more areas of their life. Connect with Cindy at CINDYPOWERSPROSOR.COM